"I am a widow, having lost my husband eight and a half years ago. Today there are so many of us—women and men, too—who had loving and fulfilling, if not perfect, marriages. We have precious memories and probably some not-so-happy memories. Those seem to fade with time.

It is lonely being by yourself after a lifetime of companionship. We miss that glass of wine on the patio before dinner, holding hands in the theater, and the comfort of sharing our bed with a loved one.

I have a friend who lost his wife a year ago. Recently he said, "I ought to write a book and call it Living Alone Is Terrible." A little terse to become a bestseller, but basically true for many.

I think it doesn't have to be that way. I believe that after the throes of grief following the loss of a loved one, we must come to grips with the reality of the situation. Here we are, in a new chapter of our lives.

The love we feel for our lost mate will never be replaced or forgotten. However, I believe that my husband would not want me to continue in my grief. He would be pleased if I found my new role satisfactory and even joyful. I feel that when I make friends and try new activities, he would say, "Way to go, Joie!"

Today there are so many possibilities. There are classes in all sorts of subjects. We can learn new skills or revive old interests that we put aside during our years of marriage and child-rearing. Joining an exercise class lifts one's spirits and is beneficial to the mind as well as the body. Dancing is a wonderful way to involve mind and body while enjoying the benefits of socialization. Now is a good time to meet new people and renew neglected friendships. There are many ways to reach out, including volunteering for a cause you believe in and visiting shut-ins or friends who are alone.

But it does have to begin with "doing it."

Hearing Sinatra's "The Best Is Yet to Come" makes me sad. I feel like I have had the best. Now I have the rest. But I do want to make the rest of my life meaningful and joyful. So I appreciate the fond memories, but I also embrace the new chapter in my life.